My Maternal Instincts

I do not feel great. Sinus Pressure Achy Icky *sigh* Kid also does not feel great. Kid shuffles over to me, looking sleepy and puffy and blah. kid: Am I hot? me: I’m not sure. There’s a website. We could post a photo and let people vote. kid: *gives me a look* No. me: *feels kid’s forehead* No. You seem normal. kid: I feel hot. me: You sure about the photo? kid: Please, no. me: hrmph Even... read more


I went out to breakfast by myself this morning. I normally try to avoid paying too much attention to what other people are talking about, because I prefer to pretend I am alone in the world after some sort of armageddon, but I do not always succeed in this fantasy. A teenage boy and his father sat at the table right next to mine. The boy looked to be about 16, and something about the way he phrased things... read more

Protected: My Lack of Proper Parenting Skillz, Let Me Show You Them

Kid: Why aren’t we assassins? You get to kill people. For money. Me: Well, that’s a career goal you could set. Kid: Okay, good. Just making sure you’d approve. Me: *shrug* I think goals are good. Kid: Because I think that would be a good job, and you don’t have to kill a person if you don’t agree that they should be killed. Me: Well… I mean there is a matter of work... read more

Anyone have a taser I can borrow?

Me: teens are invading my house Me: well at least one is Me: and that feels a lot like way too many Friend: ew Me: it also means I have to put on pants Friend: if you stop buying pants Friend: eventually Friend: you won’t have any to put on Me: and then I could refuse to allow the teens over, for their sake, and legal reasons Me: teen is IMing me telling me he is heading over soon Me: guess he did... read more

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