Happy Anniversary to a couple of couples and a big one fingered salute to a bunch of voters

I have married 5 people.

Of course I realize that I could state that in a less confusing way off the bat, but I choose not to.

I’ve been married once, to a man that I married more than 12 years ago, and that I am still happily married to.

The other 4 people are two couples that I officiated the marriages of.

Several years back I knew a couple who was getting married. Neither of them was active in a church, so rather than hire a random person they did not know to perform the wedding, a friend of theirs became ordained online. He was legally able to perform their wedding.

I thought that sounded great. When we got married, we had a judge come to our wedding to handle the paperwork. It worked out fine, but it would have been better if we had thought to use a friend instead. Thus sprouted the idea that I would like to marry somebody, and a couple of weeks later, before it could die off, a friend called to tell me she was engaged. Seeing my chance, I said, “Congratulations! Can I marry you?” She laughed, and asked some questions and it turned out to be the perfect solution to their problem, since they had already decided they did not want a religious ceremony.

I read up on the details, verified that all would be legal in our state, and made sure I knew what we would all need to do. I got myself ordained online and helped them plan the wedding. I helped them write their vows. I designed the ceremony and wrote my part. The big day finally arrived and it all went off without a hitch. It was really special to me to be involved in their wedding in such a way, and they were happy to have somebody who actually cared about them perform the wedding.

A lot of people came up to me during the reception to ask about it. A few were interested in having me perform their wedding, but I encouraged them to involve somebody they were close to. I certainly wouldn’t mind doing it, but part of the point was to further personalize the wedding day.

A few years later another couple I knew was engaged. They wanted to get married legally and then wait a few years until they had the wedding so they could save up money and throw the party the way they wanted it. So I told them what they needed to do, and they came over to my house and we did all the paperwork in my kitchen. Then we went out for some dinner and beer. Good times.

I’ve been thinking about it lately. Partly because the first couple recently celebrated their fifth wedding anniversary and couple number two is about to celebrate their second. A lot of it has been because of the elections and the news about craptastic discriminatory laws relating to marriage. When we passed the embarrassing thing back in 2000, Proposition 22 “California Defense of Marriage Act” I was totally disgusted both by the sentiment and the name. I am mildly sorry that so many people are insecure in their marriages, but mine isn’t in need of any defending, thank you very much.

a northern zodiacal constellation between Gemini and Leo

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